Grandma (2015) and life’s choices

As the movie opens our Grandma Elle’s current girlfriend is subtly trying to manipulate Elle into changing her ways and to tell her that she loves her.  Like most attempts at manipulation, it does not work and Elle pushes back harshly in the opposite direction and makes sure the relationship ends.  “You were a footnote” spits out Elle.  While that statement is indeed nasty it is also true.  Elle lost her lifelong partner of 38 years, Violet,  some time back but is still grieving deeply.   This new romance with a person about a third of Elle’s age is like a footnote in her life even if it did fill a need.

If I had named this film I would have called it “Choices”.  That is the theme throughout the movie.  The primary choice that is the subject of the film is abortion.  Elle’s granddaughter Sage is pregnant and has decided she wants to get an abortion.  She wants to go to college and does not feel she can handle it and motherhood.  We learn that Elle herself left her husband and had an abortion without telling him.  She then soon after got pregnant with a one night stand and kept the child – Sage’s mother.  “I wanted a child but not a husband.”  There were several choices made here, the illegal abortion in a basement, the loss of a husband and finally admitting that she wanted to live in a lesbian lifestyle.  None of the choices does Elle regret.

When Elle goes to her ex-husband to borrow some money to help sage, his is almost ready to help her until he finds out what it is for.  He then refuses even though they tell him the father knows and does not care.  The audience is not asked to take sides but just here another view.

When Sage and Elle breakdown and go to Sage’s mother for help she agrees and gives Sage the money.  After the procedure Elle and her daughter Judy are talking and Elle tells her to back off Sage a little. “She made a mistake” to which Judy replies”I spend my whole day helping people who made mistakes.  But they are not mistakes, they are choices.”

Another theme that still involves choices is familial relationships.  We know that Elle and Olivia were rocky and ill fit.  We learn that Judy does not have a relationship with Elle because she feels that she was cut out when Violet, her other mother, was ill.  It appears that Violet ran the family, including Elle, and after her death Elle regressed for a while. It is not clear but certainly suggested that the reason the relationship with Olivia fails is because Elle was forced into the parental role.

Judy comes to realize with the confrontation with her own daughter that she has been angry and pushing her away, much like her mother acts toward people.  In the end everyone in the family seems to grow and some rebuilding begins.  This includes Elle stopping at Olivia’s house to indirectly apologize and admit that she has loved her.

Another theme found throughout the movie is feminism.  Elle’s heroines are Betty Friedan and Simone de Beauvoir.  She has signed first editions of their books and is somewhat “mystified” that Sage does not know who either one is.  Sage is urged to stand up for herself more.

Very appropriate and engaging music is used as a bridge between scenes.  It is definitely noticeable but not over-reaching.  The music was written by Joel West who also did the music for one of my favorite films – Short Term 12.

The cinematography is acceptable but not special.  It keeps the viewer involved but does not pull them in to the character’s emotions.  A choice made by the filmmaker.  Another cinematic choice made by the Director was to have the film shot as bright and colorful.  He did not want to underline the darker moments and make the movie feel ugly.  Instead he wanted the film and the audience to focus on Elle finding the joy in helping her granddaughter and in facing the challenge of raising the money.